The dream of qualifying for the World Cup will always be a dream. But BCCI has enough money to buy FIFA and a truckload of cheerleaders, so I wouldn't be surprised if we pay ourselves into making FIFA let an IPL Dream Team play the World Cup.
With that being the nation's biggest honour that black money can buy, the following effects are inevitable.
1. Yo Yo Honey Singh will sing the official FIFA anthem along with Shakira
But is quickly arrested for racist lyrics.
2. Tiger Shroff will be the official referee for all the matches
3. SRK will be detained at the airport...
...And then banned from attending the matches
4. Virat Kohli will get the maximum number of red cards
5. Ashish Nehra will prove his excellent control over his ball once again...um, football.
6. Sir Ravindra Jadeja will be the first debutante to receive a Lifetime Achievement award
And a surprise Olympic medal.
7. A total of 1459687 footballs will be lost, thanks to Chris Gayle
8. Dhoni will be the only goalkeeper to score a goal post 90 minutes..EVERY.SINGLE.TIME.
9. Every kind of pooja will be performed for the victory of our boys
Anything that involves fire = WIN
10. At the closing ceremony, stadium fans will erupt in a mandatory 'SACHIN....SACHIN!' without reason
11. Poonam Pandey will vow to strip to the next level if we win the World Cup
She DID say she'll go all the way.
12. Faf Du Plessis will be the only player to be awarded for diving
13. Harbhajan Singh will be charged with multiple harassment cases
14. Preity Zinta will celebrate every single moment of the World Cup...
...Even if it's an own goal.
15. Sharma will be sent as an undercover spy to infiltrate the Argentinian team
Close enough.
16. Sidhu will be banned from Brazil for interrupting with absolutely unnecessary remarks.
17. The venue for the finals will be shifted to Chepauk Stadium at the last minute. Because of one man.
18. Arun Lal will once again get too drunk to remember where he is
With that being the nation's biggest honour that black money can buy, the following effects are inevitable.
1. Yo Yo Honey Singh will sing the official FIFA anthem along with Shakira
But is quickly arrested for racist lyrics.
2. Tiger Shroff will be the official referee for all the matches
3. SRK will be detained at the airport...
...And then banned from attending the matches
4. Virat Kohli will get the maximum number of red cards
5. Ashish Nehra will prove his excellent control over his ball once again...um, football.
6. Sir Ravindra Jadeja will be the first debutante to receive a Lifetime Achievement award
And a surprise Olympic medal.
7. A total of 1459687 footballs will be lost, thanks to Chris Gayle
8. Dhoni will be the only goalkeeper to score a goal post 90 minutes..EVERY.SINGLE.TIME.
9. Every kind of pooja will be performed for the victory of our boys
Anything that involves fire = WIN
10. At the closing ceremony, stadium fans will erupt in a mandatory 'SACHIN....SACHIN!' without reason
11. Poonam Pandey will vow to strip to the next level if we win the World Cup
She DID say she'll go all the way.
12. Faf Du Plessis will be the only player to be awarded for diving
13. Harbhajan Singh will be charged with multiple harassment cases
14. Preity Zinta will celebrate every single moment of the World Cup...
...Even if it's an own goal.
15. Sharma will be sent as an undercover spy to infiltrate the Argentinian team
Close enough.
16. Sidhu will be banned from Brazil for interrupting with absolutely unnecessary remarks.
17. The venue for the finals will be shifted to Chepauk Stadium at the last minute. Because of one man.
18. Arun Lal will once again get too drunk to remember where he is
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